M.O.

boys at Jones Beach 7/11

Poison ivy up both arms. Kind of looks like I was searching for a vein and there are a few bumps that have really swelled up over night. Also a long gash on my leg from a slipped chisel and somehow I managed to cut my face, too. But all in all, I'm pretty proud of myself. The carpet, linoleum and staples are now all pulled up. Although the house continues to need significant work, I am hopeful we'll get there some day....

If I could do everything myself I would. I really do not trust the contractors who come by to give quotes on repairs. The prices span a dazzingly broad spectrum for no good reason. And the personalities! I winced, today, when one contractor kicked one of our rotting posts. Um, please be careful, it's barely supporting that corner as you can see....

Obviously, I have good reason to be distrustful of anyone who stands to make their living profiting off our problems. But I realize I tend to be this way in my other interactions, too. Is it autism or was I always this way, being very much the middle child after all? I realize there are very few people I truly trust. Despite how it appears at this blog where I am barely hidden and blab my head off, I don't easily reveal myself to others in real life unless I know it's truly okay. A few weeks back, I was pushing Allie around next door, trying to force some make up on her and basically being a royal pain in the ass as I chased her with blush and she ran away laughing. Two grown women. Then other families started to arrive for whatever it was, brunch I think. 15 minutes later, she turned to me and asked. Are you okay? What did she mean? Of course I was okay!! But I knew what she meant in a way. I had become a different person with the arrival of other people, still chatty and friendly enough, but I had crawled back into my shell. Even at risk of poison ivy and the like, it's my M.O.